The Voices in My Head

Every woman has her skinny jeans. We pull them from the recesses of our closets, suck in our tummies to tug them on and then, if Jupiter has aligned with Mars, we punch our fists in the air and scream “Yes, they still fit!”

I made a ton of desserts around the holidays, and except for the ones I served to family and friends, I consumed a vast number.  Will my skinny jeans be relegated back to the recesses of my closet?

I still have some of the cookies frozen, and every time I open the freezer drawer, a little voice in my head I like to call “Thinner” would caution me “Don’t pop that rum ball into your mouth. You’ll be wearing it on your thighs for the next 5 months”. But “Winner” her nemesis would rationally say “You only make these at Christmas.  Enjoy!! ” Suffice it to say, “Winner” always won.  I mean seriously, they’re rum balls!!!!

I’ve been exercising as of late with wonderful classes given by a resident of our community via Zoom.  “Thinner” is ecstatic. “You won’t be having to closet your skinny jeans after all,” she chirped.

I attended Tuesday’s class, but unfortunately “Winner” triumphed on Thursday. The day dawned cloudy and chilly and she murmured in my ear “So many things to do. Pour yourself another cup of coffee and do the crossword puzzle instead.” And I did. And I surrendered to her the next few mornings the class was offered as well.

Some would say hoping to continue to wear my skinny jeans is the least of my problems. Hearing voices in my head probably should take precedent. Fortunately, I’m told, straight jackets come in One Size Fits All.